March 25, 2004


Apropos Simon's discussion of anti-slowjams, blatantly unsexual tracks are an easy target, but what about tracks that are uh bending over backwards to be erotic but which are about as alluring as last week's socks? Case in point: Mariah Carey's 'Honey'. (Actually, it's a bit of a random selection with Mariah; just about any of her 'r and b' numbers would have been equally culpable, although I suppose there's a case for saying that 'Honey' is especially sleazy, with its non-too subtle semen-is-like-honey simile). And naturally Beyonce's latest would get a vote from me: Beyonce's patented 'erotic' moans (all those diva-ish 'whoooooahs') are about as convincing as those of a Kings Cross prostitute at the end of a particularly demanding shift. Just why is it that Beyonce is so unsexy?

Posted by mark at March 25, 2004 07:26 PM | TrackBack

Probably because she seems to think that "sexy" is a stand-alone quality that can be recorded on a spreadsheet and attained by being over-energetic and brazen in minimal clothing. And there are those hard, tax-inspector eyes, of course....

Posted by: Nigel R. at March 26, 2004 07:31 PM


Posted by: yootma at September 27, 2004 05:28 AM